Will you make me believe that I am not sent for you?
Are you trying to tell me I wasn't sent to find you?
Come on, don't tell me I wasn't sent here for you.
u weren't who i came for?
Go to, go to, thou art a foolish fellow.
Let me be clear of thee.
Come on, you're foolish. Leave me alone.
Look, you're an idiot. Get away from me.
you're an idiot leave me alone
Well held out, i’ faith! No, I do not know you, nor I am not sent to
you by my lady, to bid you come speak with her; nor your name is not
Master Cesario; nor this is not my nose neither. Nothing that is so, is
so.
Sure, go on with that story! No, I don't know you, and I'm not sent by my lady to tell you to come talk to her; nor is your name Master Cesario; nor is this my nose either. Everything that is true just isn't so.
Yeah right, very funny. Look, I do know you—I'm definitely sent from my lady asking you to come see her. Your name is definitely Cesario. And this is absolutely my nose. Everything's real.
funny i know u sent from lady olivia u are cesario everythings real
I prithee vent thy folly somewhere else,
Thou know’st not me.
Please take your foolishness somewhere else. You don't know who I am.
Go be stupid somewhere else. You don't know me.
go away u dont know me
Vent my folly! He has heard that word of some great man, and now
applies it to a fool. Vent my folly! I am afraid this great lubber, the
world, will prove a cockney. I prithee now, ungird thy strangeness, and
tell me what I shall vent to my lady. Shall I vent to her that thou art
coming?
My foolishness? He heard that word from some important man and now he's using it to describe an idiot like me. My foolishness! I'm worried that this huge world is going to become sensitive like a city person. Come on, drop this act and tell me what I should say to my lady. Should I tell her you're coming?
My foolishness? He picked up some fancy word from an important guy and now he's throwing it at me. I'm scared the world's getting soft and picky. Stop pretending—just tell me what to say to my lady. Do I tell her you're showing up?
im not foolish stop pretending whats ur message for olivia are u coming or not
I prithee, foolish Greek, depart from me.
There’s money for thee; if you tarry longer
I shall give worse payment.
Please, you ridiculous person, go away from me. There's money for you; if you stay longer I'll give you a worse payment.
Look, just leave me alone, okay? Here's some money. Stay any longer and I'll beat you instead.
leave me alone here money stay longer u get hit
By my troth, thou hast an open hand. These wise men that give fools
money get themselves a good report—after fourteen years’ purchase.
Honestly, you have an open hand. Wise men who give money to fools earn themselves a good reputation—after fourteen years of paying for it.
Wow, you're generous. But here's the thing: wise guys who throw money at idiots end up thinking they've made a good investment—for about fourteen years, till they get over it.
ur generous giving money to fools takes 14 years to feel good about it
Now sir, have I met you again? There’s for you.
Well, sir, have I found you again? Here's for you.
So, we meet again. This is for you.
found u here take this
Sebastian's key moment is when he accepts that he doesn't understand what's happening and decides to go along with it anyway. He's confused about his identity, confused about why people keep attacking him, confused about why a beautiful woman is suddenly in love with him. Most people would demand answers. Sebastian simply notes that his memory might be failing him (which might imply he's being enchanted) and decides to see where it leads. It's pragmatism mixed with a willingness to trust. By the end of the play, this decision will have led him into a marriage with Olivia — not because he deceived her, but because he simply chose not to demand clarity when confusion seemed inevitable.
Why, there’s for thee, and there, and there.
Are all the people mad?
Well, here's for you, and here, and here. Is everyone around here insane?
You want it? There's some of it. And here's more. Is everyone crazy?
here u go here and here is everyone insane
Hold, sir, or I’ll throw your dagger o’er the house.
Stop, sir, or I'll throw your sword out the window.
Whoa, stop it or I'll throw your sword out of the house.
stop or ill throw ur sword out
This will I tell my lady straight. I would not be in some of your coats
for twopence.
I'm going to tell my lady right now. I wouldn't want to be in your position for a penny.
I'm telling my lady about this right now. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes for anything.
telling olivia dont wanna be u
Come on, sir, hold!
Come on now, wait a moment!
Come on, hold on!
hold on
Nay, let him alone, I’ll go another way to work with him. I’ll have an
action of battery against him, if there be any law in Illyria. Though I
struck him first, yet it’s no matter for that.
No, let him go. I'm going to try another approach with him. I'll sue him for assault, if there's any law in Illyria. Even though I hit him first, it doesn't matter for that.
No, forget it, let him go. I've got a better plan. I'll take him to court for hitting me—there's got to be laws here in Illyria. Even if I threw the first punch, I can still sue.
let him go im suing him instead i hit him first but doesnt matter
Let go thy hand!
Let go of my hand!
Let me go!
let go
Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, my young soldier, put up your
iron: you are well fleshed. Come on.
No, I won't let you go, sir. Come on, my young warrior, put your sword away: you've already gotten some good practice. Come on.
Not happening. You're staying put, young man. Put your sword down—you've already had your workout. Come on.
not letting go put down ur sword u already fought
I will be free from thee. What wouldst thou now?
If thou dar’st tempt me further, draw thy sword.
I will free myself from you. What do you want now? If you dare push me any further, draw your sword.
I'm getting away from you. What's your deal? You keep pushing and I'm actually going to use my sword.
im leaving stop pushing illuse my sword
What makes this scene funny and dangerous simultaneously is that no one is lying. Olivia genuinely believes she's talking to Cesario. Sebastian genuinely doesn't know who Cesario is. Sir Toby and Sir Andrew genuinely thought they were fighting Cesario, not a different person. Nobody has malicious intent. But the machinery of mistaken identity has created a situation where everyone is acting on false information, and the more they act, the more the false information seems confirmed. By the end of the scene, Sebastian is accepting marriage to a woman he's just met who thinks he's someone he's not, and he's doing it not out of deception but out of bewilderment and a kind of trusting acceptance of chaos.
What, what? Nay, then, I must have an ounce or two of this malapert
blood from you.
What, what? Well, then I must take some of this rude blood from you.
Oh yeah? Then I'll have to bleed you a bit for being so disrespectful.
ok then im taking blood
Hold, Toby! On thy life I charge thee hold!
Stop, Toby! I command you to stop on pain of your life!
Stop it, Toby! I'm ordering you to stop right now!
stop toby im ordering u to
Madam.
Madam.
madam.
Madam.
Will it be ever thus? Ungracious wretch,
Fit for the mountains and the barbarous caves,
Where manners ne’er were preach’d! Out of my sight!
Be not offended, dear Cesario.
Rudesby, be gone!
Will it be like this forever? Rude creature, fit for wild mountains and uncivilized caves where no manners were ever taught! Get out of my sight! Don't be upset, dear Cesario. Get out of here, you rude animals!
Is this ever going to stop? You're an animal—you belong in mountains and caves where nobody taught people how to act. Get out! Sorry Cesario, don't worry. The rest of you, get lost!
stop this go away u belong in caves sorry cesario the rest get out
I prithee, gentle friend,
Let thy fair wisdom, not thy passion, sway
In this uncivil and unjust extent
Against thy peace. Go with me to my house,
And hear thou there how many fruitless pranks
This ruffian hath botch’d up, that thou thereby
Mayst smile at this. Thou shalt not choose but go.
Do not deny. Beshrew his soul for me,
He started one poor heart of mine, in thee.
I ask you, dear friend, let your good judgment, not your emotions, guide you through this rude and unfair treatment. Come with me to my house, and there I'll tell you about all the failed tricks this brute has managed to pull, so you can laugh it off. You must come with me—you have no choice. Don't refuse. Curse him for me—he frightened the only heart I have, and that heart now belongs to you.
Look, dear friend, use your head here, not your feelings, with this awful and unfair situation. Come back to my place with me, and I'll tell you all about the stupid pranks this rude guy keeps trying, so you can just laugh about it. You're coming with me—that's it, no arguments. Don't say no. I curse him—he scared my heart, and now it's yours.
use ur head not feelings here come to my house i'll tell u about his stupid pranks u gotta come no way out dont refuse pls curse him 4 me he scared my heart n now its urs
What relish is in this? How runs the stream?
Or I am mad, or else this is a dream.
Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep;
If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep!
What does this feel like? How do things work this way? Either I'm losing my mind, or this is a dream. Let imagination keep my senses numb in forgetfulness; if this is what dreaming is, let me sleep forever!
What is this? How is this happening? I'm either crazy or I'm dreaming. Either way, I hope I never wake up. If this is what dreaming is, I never want to stop.
whats happening am i crazy or dreaming if this is dreaming keep me asleep
Nay, come, I prithee. Would thou’dst be ruled by me!
No, come on, please. I want you to be guided by me.
Come on, please. Just do what I say.
please just listen to me
Madam, I will.
Madam, I will.
madam, i will.
Madam, I will.
O, say so, and so be!
Oh, say yes, and let it be!
Say yes and let it happen!
say yes
The Reckoning
This is the moment when the mistaken identities become active rather than passive. Until now, Viola has been controlling her disguise. Now her twin shows up and people begin treating him as Cesario without his knowledge or consent. Sebastian doesn't know he has a twin in the city. He doesn't know what he's being mistaken for. He just knows that a woman is attracted to him and people keep accosting him for reasons he doesn't understand. By agreeing to go with Olivia, he sets the final domino in motion.
If this happened today…
You're visiting a city and keep running into the same person. First, a clown accosts you for reasons you don't understand. Then a weak guy tries to fight you (for reasons you still don't understand). Then a beautiful woman appears, acts like she knows you, is impressed by your fighting, and asks you to spend time with her. You have no idea what's happening, but she's attractive and everyone seems to know you here, so you go along with it.