Master Fenton, talk not to me. My mind is heavy. I will give over all.
Master Fenton, don't talk to me. I'm feeling depressed. I'm giving up everything.
Master Fenton, don't even talk to me. I'm too upset. I'm done with all of this.
fenton stop. too sad. im done.
Yet hear me speak. Assist me in my purpose,
And, as I am a gentleman, I’ll give thee
A hundred pound in gold more than your loss.
But please hear me speak. Help me with my plan, And I promise you, as a gentleman, I'll give you a hundred pounds in gold beyond what you've lost.
Just listen to me. Help me with what I'm trying to do, And I swear as a gentleman, I'll give you a hundred pounds in gold more than you lost.
listen 2 me. help me. ill give u 100 pounds gold. trust me.
I will hear you, Master Fenton, and I will, at the least, keep your
counsel.
I will listen to you, Master Fenton, and I promise I'll keep your secret.
Alright, I'll hear you out, Master Fenton, and at least I'll keep it quiet.
ok ill listen. ill keep ur secret.
From time to time I have acquainted you
With the dear love I bear to fair Anne Page,
Who mutually hath answered my affection,
So far forth as herself might be her chooser,
Even to my wish. I have a letter from her
Of such contents as you will wonder at,
The mirth whereof so larded with my matter
That neither singly can be manifested
Without the show of both, wherein fat Falstaff
Hath a great scene; the image of the jest
I’ll show you here at large. Hark, good mine host:
Tonight at Herne’s oak, just ’twixt twelve and one,
Must my sweet Nan present the Fairy Queen—
The purpose why is here—in which disguise,
While other jests are something rank on foot,
Her father hath commanded her to slip
Away with Slender, and with him at Eton
Immediately to marry. She hath consented. Now, sir,
Her mother, even strong against that match
And firm for Doctor Caius, hath appointed
That he shall likewise shuffle her away,
While other sports are tasking of their minds,
And at the dean’ry, where a priest attends,
Straight marry her. To this her mother’s plot
She, seemingly obedient, likewise hath
Made promise to the doctor. Now thus it rests:
Her father means she shall be all in white
And in that habit, when Slender sees his time
To take her by the hand and bid her go,
She shall go with him. Her mother hath intended
The better to denote her to the doctor,
For they must all be masked and vizarded—
That quaint in green she shall be loose enrobed,
With ribbons pendant flaring ’bout her head;
And when the doctor spies his vantage ripe,
To pinch her by the hand, and on that token
The maid hath given consent to go with him.
I've told you many times how much I love fair Anne Page. She loves me back just as much as she's able to choose for herself—exactly as I'd wish. I have a letter from her that will amaze you. It's written so both our parts are woven through it—neither makes sense alone without the other, and the funny part even includes fat Falstaff playing a scene. Let me explain the whole plan: Tonight at Herne's oak, right around midnight, my sweet Anne must appear as the Fairy Queen. Here's why: while others are busy playing pranks, her father has ordered her to run away with Slender and marry him immediately at Eton. She's agreed to this. Now, her mother—who strongly opposes that match and wants Doctor Caius instead—has arranged for the doctor to also take her away while everyone's occupied with games. They'll marry right at the church office where a priest is waiting. Anne has pretended to go along with her mother's plan as well. Here's how it's arranged: Her father wants her dressed all in white. When Slender sees his chance, he'll take her hand and bid her to go, and she'll go with him. Her mother has arranged it differently to point Anne toward the doctor instead. Since everyone will be masked and in disguise, her mother plans for Anne to wear something fancy in green with ribbons flying around her head. When the doctor spots his opportunity, he'll pinch her hand, and she's agreed that this signal means she'll go with him.
I've told you many times how much I love Anne Page. She feels the same way about me—as much as she's allowed to choose for herself. I've got a letter from her that'll blow your mind. It's written so both our parts are mixed in—you can't understand it without both of us. And it even has fat Falstaff playing a part in it. Here's the plan: Tonight at Herne's oak, around midnight, Anne has to pretend to be the Fairy Queen. The reason is: while everyone's busy with other jokes, her dad told her to sneak off with Slender and get married right away at Eton. She said yes. Her mother though—she hates that idea and wants Anne to marry Doctor Caius instead—so she arranged for Caius to sneak her away while everyone's distracted. They'd get married at the church office where a priest is ready. Anne's pretended to go along with her mom's plan too. So here's the deal: Her dad wants her dressed all in white. When Slender gets his moment, he'll grab her hand and tell her to go with him, and she will. Her mom wants something different—she's arranged for Anne to wear something fancy and green with ribbons streaming from her head. When the doctor gets his chance, he'll pinch her hand, and that's the signal she'll go with him.
ive told u bout anne. she loves me back. got letter from her thats crazy. tonight shes fairy queen at midnight. her dad wants her 2 run w slender n marry. she said yes. her mom wants her 2 run w doctor caius n marry instead. both think theyre gonna get her. shes dressed 2 trick em both.
Which means she to deceive, father or mother?
Which one does she plan to deceive—her father or her mother?
So who's she actually going to trick—her dad or her mom?
who shes trickin? dad or mom?
Both, my good host, to go along with me.
And here it rests, that you’ll procure the vicar
To stay for me at church, ’twixt twelve and one,
And, in the lawful name of marrying,
To give our hearts united ceremony.
Both, my good host—she'll trick them both and come with me. So here's what I need: arrange for the vicar To wait for me at church around midnight, And perform the legal marriage ceremony That will unite our hearts.
Both of them, my good friend—she's going to fool them both and run away with me. Here's what I need from you: get the vicar to stay at the church around midnight, So he can legally marry us and make us husband and wife.
both. shell trick em both n come w me. get priest at church around midnight. legally marry us.
Well, husband your device; I’ll to the vicar.
Bring you the maid, you shall not lack a priest.
Very well, organize your plan carefully. I'll go to the vicar. Bring the girl, and you'll have a priest ready.
Alright, get your plan together. I'll go talk to the vicar. You bring the girl, and there'll be a priest waiting.
ok ill get priest. u bring girl.
So shall I evermore be bound to thee;
Besides, I’ll make a present recompense.
I will forever be grateful to you. Besides, I'll give you a reward right away.
You'll have my loyalty forever. Plus I'll give you a reward right now.
ill owe u 4 life. ill pay u now.
The Reckoning
In this short scene the play's romantic plot finally takes shape, as Fenton reveals that Anne Page will outwit both her parents and marry him at midnight. Up to now Anne has mostly been a prize the adults haggle over. Here, through her letter, she turns out to be the cleverest schemer in Windsor: she has promised herself to Slender and to Caius so that she can escape with neither. Notice how exactly the costume signals are set up (white for the father, green for the mother). Everything in the last act depends on them, and the audience now knows more than any parent does. The Host, who has just been robbed of his horses, cheers up at the chance of a hundred pounds and a trick of his own.
If this happened today…
Your parents disagree about who you should date, and each of them has quietly set you up with someone for the same night: your dad wants you in white so his pick can find you at the party, and your mum wants you in green so hers can. You've said yes to both of them. Then you call your friend who owns the venue and ask him to have a car waiting out back, because you're leaving with the person you actually chose. He's having a terrible week, but the offer of a big favour in return and the chance to be in on the plan cheer him right up.