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Act 3, Scene 1 — Athens. A room in Lucullus’ house
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Faithful Conversational Text-message
The argument Timon's servant Flaminius comes to Lucullus to borrow fifty talents. Lucullus is expecting a gift, so he greets him warmly and calls for wine. When he hears the real errand he backs away. He complains that Timon was always too lavish, then offers Flaminius three coins as a bribe to say he never found him at home. Flaminius throws the money back and curses him.
Flaminius waiting to speak with Lucullus from his master.
Enter a Servant to him.
SERVANT [polite, helpful — the servant is doing his duty]

I have told my lord of you; he is coming down to you.

I've told my master about you. He's coming down now.

I told him you're here. He's on his way down.

told my master he's coming down

FLAMINIUS [grateful, formal — Flaminius is respectful to the servant]

I thank you, sir.

I appreciate your kind assistance, sir.

Thanks for your help, sir.

thanks

Enter Lucullus.
SERVANT [polite announcement]

Here’s my lord.

Here is my master.

Here he is.

here's my master

LUCULLUS [greedily anticipating a gift]

[_Aside_.] One of Lord Timon’s men? A gift, I warrant. Why, this hits

right. I dreamt of a silver basin and ewer tonight.—Flaminius, honest

Flaminius, you are very respectively welcome, sir. Fill me some wine.

One of Lord Timon's servants? A gift, I'm sure. Why, this is perfect. I dreamed of a silver basin and pitcher last night. Flaminius, honest Flaminius, you are very respectfully welcome, sir. Pour me some wine.

One of Lord Timon's guys? A gift, I bet. This is perfect—I dreamed about getting a silver basin and pitcher last night. Flaminius, honest Flaminius, you're very welcome, sir. Get me some wine.

timons guy? gift? perfect! i dreamed of silver basin & pitcher. welcome. get me wine

[_Exit Servant._]
LUCULLUS [oily flattery, buttering him up]

And how does that honourable, complete, free-hearted gentleman of

Athens, thy very bountiful good lord and master?

And how is that honorable, complete, free-hearted gentleman of Athens—your very generous good lord and master?

So how's that noble, generous lord of yours doing? Your master?

how's ur generous lord doing

FLAMINIUS [simple, direct answer — Flaminius is still unaware of what's coming]

His health is well, sir.

His health is fine, sir.

He's healthy, sir.

he's healthy

LUCULLUS [false concern, eagerness — Lucullus presses for details about the gift he imagines]

I am right glad that his health is well, sir. And what hast thou there

under thy cloak, pretty Flaminius?

I'm very glad his health is well, sir. Now, what is that under your cloak, pretty Flaminius?

Good to hear he's doing well. So what's that you've got under your cloak, Flaminius?

what's under your cloak i'm very curious

FLAMINIUS [formal, sincere — Flaminius delivers his master's request with dignity]

Faith, nothing but an empty box, sir, which in my lord’s behalf I come

to entreat your honour to supply; who, having great and instant

occasion to use fifty talents, hath sent to your lordship to furnish

him, nothing doubting your present assistance therein.

Nothing but an empty box, sir. In my lord's behalf, I come to ask your honor to fill it — he has urgent need of fifty talents and has sent me to your lordship to provide them. He doubts not your immediate help.

Nothing but an empty box, sir. I'm here asking for your help — my lord needs fifty talents right now, and he sent me to you because he's sure you'll help him out.

just an empty box my master needs fifty talents soon he's counting on you

LUCULLUS [cold refusal masked as sympathy]

La, la, la, la! Nothing doubting, says he? Alas, good lord! A noble

gentleman ’tis, if he would not keep so good a house. Many a time and

often I ha’ dined with him, and told him on’t, and come again to supper

to him of purpose to have him spend less, and yet he would embrace no

counsel, take no warning by my coming. Every man has his fault, and

honesty is his. I ha’ told him on’t, but I could ne’er get him from ’t.

Oh my, no, no, no! He doubts not, you say? Poor lord! A noble gentleman, truly — if only he wouldn't keep such an expensive household. I've eaten dinner with him many times and told him so, and come back again for supper on purpose to urge him to spend less. Yet he would hear no advice, ignore all my warnings. Every man has his flaw, and his is his generosity — I've told him so, but I could never make him stop.

Oh come on! He has no doubts? That poor guy. Look, he's a great nobleman — if only he didn't spend so much money. I've had dinner with him a bunch of times, told him to lighten up, even came back for supper to tell him again. But would he listen? No. Everyone's got their problem, and his is that he's too generous. I keep telling him, but he never learns.

he spends too much i've told him so many times but he won't listen that's his flaw — his generosity

Enter Servant with wine.
SERVANT [formal, deferential]

Please your lordship, here is the wine.

If it pleases you, here is the wine.

Here's the wine you wanted, sir.

heres your wine

LUCULLUS [false compliment — Lucullus is buttering up Flaminius before the bribe]

Flaminius, I have noted thee always wise. Here’s to thee.

Flaminius, I have always seen you as a wise man. Here's to you.

Flaminius, you've always struck me as smart. Let me drink to you.

you're wise i'll drink to you

FLAMINIUS [formal, neutral — Flaminius is polite but doesn't know what's about to happen]

Your lordship speaks your pleasure.

You honor me, sir.

That's kind of you.

that's kind

LUCULLUS [continued false flattery — setting up the bribe before dismissing the servant]

I have observed thee always for a towardly prompt spirit, give thee thy

due, and one that knows what belongs to reason, and canst use the time

well, if the time use thee well. Good parts in thee. [_To Servant_.]

Get you gone, sirrah.—

I've always seen you as a promising young man with a sharp mind — someone who knows what makes sense and can use his time well if fortune favors him. You have good qualities. Servant, go away now.

You've always seemed like a smart, capable guy to me — someone who understands what matters and can take advantage of good luck. You've got real potential. Now get out of here, boy.

you're smart you've got potential you understand things come on, servant, beat it

[_Exit Servant._]
LUCULLUS [bribing him to buy his silence]

Draw nearer, honest Flaminius. Thy lord’s a bountiful gentleman, but

thou art wise and thou know’st well enough, although thou com’st to me,

that this is no time to lend money, especially upon bare friendship

without security. Here’s three solidares for thee. Good boy, wink at

me, and say thou saw’st me not. Fare thee well.

Come closer, honest Flaminius. Your lord is a generous man, but you're wise and well know that, although you're here asking me, this is not a time to lend money, especially on mere friendship without security. Here's three coins for you. Be quiet about it, and say you didn't see me. Take care.

Listen, Flaminius, come here. Your master's generous, sure, but you're smart. You know it's a bad time to lend money, especially without something backing it up. Here's three coins for you. Keep quiet about this—pretend you didn't see me. Goodbye.

come here fla yo master's generous but u know its bad time for loans no collateral here's 3 coins dont tell anyone we met

FLAMINIUS ≋ verse [horrified, disgusted, betrayed — Flaminius suddenly understands the cruelty of what's happening]

Is’t possible the world should so much differ,

And we alive that lived? Fly, damned baseness,

To him that worships thee.

Is it possible that the world has changed so completely, and we're the ones who have to live in it? Away with such baseness — let it go to whoever worships it.

Is this real? How can everything be so different? How can people be so vile? Get out of here, you disgusting offer — go to someone who actually values that garbage.

has the world changed this much? from when we were alive? this is baseness go to whoever worships you

[_Throws the money back._]
LUCULLUS [contemptuous, insulted — Lucullus is angry at being rejected and called out]

Ha! Now I see thou art a fool and fit for thy master.

Look at you now — you're a fool, and you deserve such a foolish master.

There you go. You're an idiot, and you're perfect for an idiot master.

you're a fool just like your master

[_Exit._]
FLAMINIUS ≋ verse [outraged, vengeful, feeling Timon's pain — Flaminius releases his fury against Lucullus, prophesying his doom]

May these add to the number that may scald thee!

Let molten coin be thy damnation,

Thou disease of a friend, and not himself!

Has friendship such a faint and milky heart

It turns in less than two nights? O you gods,

I feel my master’s passion. This slave

Unto his honour has my lord’s meat in him.

Why should it thrive and turn to nutriment

When he is turned to poison?

O, may diseases only work upon’t,

And when he’s sick to death, let not that part of nature

Which my lord paid for be of any power

To expel sickness, but prolong his hour.

May these coins add to your wounds! Let molten gold be what destroys you, you disease that poisons friendship itself and all who befriend you! How can friendship turn so thin and weak in just one night? Oh you gods, I feel my master's pain — this slave has fed his mouth on food my lord bought. Why should that nourishment flourish and support him when my master has turned to poison in his eyes? Oh, may diseases alone work on that food, and when he's dying of sickness, may that part of his body that my lord once paid for have no power to heal him, but only drag out his suffering.

I hope those coins burn you! I hope molten gold becomes what kills you, you corrupt thing that destroys real friendship! How can friendship become so weak and spineless overnight? I can feel how much my master is hurt — this guy has eaten food that Timon paid for. Why should it build him up and keep him alive when my master is now poison to him? I hope disease eats at that food, and when he's sick and dying, I hope the body that my lord spent money on has no power to save him — only draws out his death.

may molten coin destroy you may disease eat your body the body that timon paid for may it not save you may it only prolong your suffering

[_Exit._]

The Reckoning

This is the first of Timon's friends to fail the test, and his refusal shows that the friendship Athens showed Timon was always an appetite. Lucullus flips from gushing to evasive within a few lines. He dreamt of a silver basin and hopes for another present. The moment he hears 'empty box' he recasts himself as the wise friend who always warned Timon against spending, though he ate at Timon's table the whole time. Watch the bribe: he tries to buy Flaminius's silence with a tip. It is the same logic of money standing in for loyalty that Flaminius rejects. Flaminius's closing curse, that the food Timon fed Lucullus should turn to poison in him, previews the rage Timon himself will soon feel.

If this happened today…

Your boss has lost everything, and you're sent to ask a man who has been to fifty of his dinner parties for a loan. He answers the door beaming because he assumes you've brought another gift. Then you explain. His face changes. Suddenly he always told your boss he spent too much. He pours you a drink, praises your good sense, slips you a fifty and says, 'You never saw me, right?' You walk out realizing the friendship was catering all along.

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