← 4.2
Act 4, Scene 3 — The Florentine camp.
on stage:
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The argument Parolles, blindfolded and believing himself a prisoner of war, confesses everything he knows and slanders his own allies; unmasked before Bertram, he is left to face himself — and somehow survives it.
Enter the two French Lords and two or three Soldiers.
FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

You have not given him his mother’s letter?

You have not given him his mother’s letter?

you 've not given him h's mother’s letter?

You have not given him his mother’s letter?

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

I have deliv’red it an hour since; there is something in’t that stings

his nature; for on the reading it, he chang’d almost into another man.

I have deliv’red it an hour since; there is something in’t that stings his nature; for on the reading it, he chang’d almost into another man.

i 've deliv’red it an hour since; there 's something in’t that stings h's nature; for on the reading it, he chang’d almost into another man.

I have deliv’red it an hour since; there is something in’t that...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so good a wife

and so sweet a lady.

He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so good a wife and so sweet a lady.

he has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so good a wife and so sweet a lady.

He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Especially he hath incurred the everlasting displeasure of the king,

who had even tun’d his bounty to sing happiness to him. I will tell you

a thing, but you shall let it dwell darkly with you.

Especially he has incurred the everlasting displeasure of the king, who had even tun’d his bounty to sing happiness to him. I will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell darkly with you.

especially he has incurred the everlasting displeasure of the king, who had even tun’d h's bounty to sing happiness to him. i will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell darkly with you.

Especially he has incurred the everlasting displeasure of the king, who had...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

When you have spoken it, ’tis dead, and I am the grave of it.

When you have spoken it, ’is dead, and I am the grave of it.

when you 've spoken it, ’t's dead, and i am the grave of it.

When you have spoken it, ’is dead, and I am the grave...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

He hath perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a most

chaste renown, and this night he fleshes his will in the spoil of her

honour; he hath given her his monumental ring, and thinks himself made

in the unchaste composition.

He has perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a most chaste renown, and this night he fleshes his will in the spoil of her honour; he has given her his monumental ring, and thinks himself made in the unchaste composition.

he has perverted a young gentlewoman here in florence, of a most chaste renown, and th's night he fleshes h's will in the spoil of her honour; he has given her h's monumental ring, and thinks himself made in the unchaste composition.

He has perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a most...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Now, God delay our rebellion! As we are ourselves, what things are we!

Now, God delay our rebellion! As we are ourselves, what things are we!

now, god delay our rebellion! as we 're ourselves, what things 're we!

Now, God delay our rebellion! As we are ourselves, what things are...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of all treasons,

we still see them reveal themselves till they attain to their abhorr’d

ends; so he that in this action contrives against his own nobility, in

his proper stream, o’erflows himself.

Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of all treasons, we still see them reveal themselves till they attain to their abhorr’d ends; so he that in this action contrives against his own nobility, in his proper stream, o’erflows himself.

merely our own traitors. and as in the common course of all treasons, we still see them reveal themselves till they attain to their abhorr’d ends; so he that in th's action contrives against h's own nobility, in h's proper stream, o’erflows himself.

Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of all...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Is it not meant damnable in us to be trumpeters of our unlawful

intents? We shall not then have his company tonight?

Is it not meant damnable in us to be trumpeters of our unlawful intents? We shall not then have his company tonight?

's it not meant damnable in us to be trumpeters of our unlawful intents? we shall not then 've h's company tonight?

Is it not meant damnable in us to be trumpeters of our...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour.

Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour.

not till after midnight; for he 's dieted to h's hour.

Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour.

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

That approaches apace. I would gladly have him see his company

anatomized, that he might take a measure of his own judgments, wherein

so curiously he had set this counterfeit.

That approaches apace. I would gladly have him see his company anatomized, that he might take a measure of his own judgments, wherein so curiously he had set this counterfeit.

that approaches apace. i would gladly 've him see h's company anatomized, that he might take a measure of h's own judgments, wherein so curiously he had set th's counterfeit.

That approaches apace. I would gladly have him see his company anatomized,...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

We will not meddle with him till he come; for his presence must be the

whip of the other.

We will not meddle with him till he come; for his presence must be the whip of the other.

we will not meddle with him till he come; for h's presence must be the whip of the other.

We will not meddle with him till he come; for his presence...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

In the meantime, what hear you of these wars?

In the meantime, what hear you of these wars?

in the meantime, what hear you of these wars?

In the meantime, what hear you of these wars?

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

I hear there is an overture of peace.

I hear there is an overture of peace.

i hear there 's an overture of peace.

I hear there is an overture of peace.

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Nay, I assure you, a peace concluded.

no, I assure you, a peace concluded.

no, i assure you, a peace concluded.

no, I assure you, a peace concluded.

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

What will Count Rossillon do then? Will he travel higher, or return

again into France?

What will Count Rossillon do then? Will he travel higher, or return again into France?

what will count rossillon do then? will he travel higher, or return again into france?

What will Count Rossillon do then? Will he travel higher, or return...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

I perceive by this demand, you are not altogether of his council.

I perceive by this demand, you are not altogether of his council.

i perceive by th's demand, you 're not altogether of h's council.

I perceive by this demand, you are not altogether of his council.

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Let it be forbid, sir! So should I be a great deal of his act.

Let it be forbid, sir! So should I be a great deal of his act.

let it be forbid, sir! so should i be a great deal of h's act.

Let it be forbid, sir! So should I be a great deal...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his house. Her pretence

is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; which holy undertaking with

most austere sanctimony she accomplished; and there residing, the

tenderness of her nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a

groan of her last breath, and now she sings in heaven.

Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his house. Her pretence is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; which holy undertaking with most austere sanctimony she accomplished; and there residing, the tenderness of her nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of her last breath, and now she sings in heaven.

sir, h's wife some two months since fled from h's house. her pretence 's a pilgrimage to saint jaques le grand; which holy undertaking with most austere sanctimony she accomplished; and there residing, the tenderness of her nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of her last breath, and now she sings in heaven.

Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his house. Her...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

How is this justified?

How is this justified?

how 's th's justified?

How is this justified?

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her story true,

even to the point of her death. Her death itself, which could not be

her office to say is come, was faithfully confirm’d by the rector of

the place.

The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her story true, even to the point of her death. Her death itself, which could not be her office to say is come, was faithfully confirm’d by the rector of the place.

the stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her story true, even to the point of her death. her death itself, which could not be her office to say 's come, was faithfully confirm’d by the rector of the place.

The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Hath the count all this intelligence?

has the count all this intelligence?

has the count all th's intelligence?

has the count all this intelligence?

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, to the full

arming of the verity.

Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, to the full arming of the verity.

ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, to the full arming of the verity.

Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, to the full arming...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

I am heartily sorry that he’ll be glad of this.

I am heartily sorry that he’ll be glad of this.

i am heartily sorry that he’ll be glad of this.

I am heartily sorry that he’ll be glad of this.

Why it matters This is the most damning line any character speaks about Bertram. Not an accusation, not a speech — just a quiet acknowledgment that Bertram will greet his wife's death as good news.
↩ Callback to 2-3 The Second Lord's 'I am heartily sorry that he'll be glad of this' echoes the warnings the Lords gave each other in 2-3 about Bertram's character — the prediction has been completely fulfilled.
FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses!

How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses!

how mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses!

How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses!

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

And how mightily some other times we drown our gain in tears! The great

dignity that his valour hath here acquir’d for him shall at home be

encountered with a shame as ample.

And how mightily some other times we drown our gain in tears! The great dignity that his valour has here acquir’d for him shall at home be encountered with a shame as ample.

and how mightily some other times we drown our gain in tears! the great dignity that h's valour has here acquir’d for him shall at home be encountered with a shame as ample.

And how mightily some other times we drown our gain in tears!...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill together; our

virtues would be proud if our faults whipped them not; and our crimes

would despair if they were not cherish’d by our virtues.

The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill together; our virtues would be proud if our faults whipped them not; and our crimes would despair if they were not cherish’d by our virtues.

the web of our life 's of a mingled yarn, good and ill together; our virtues would be proud if our faults whipped them not; and our crimes would despair if they were not cherish’d by our virtues.

The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and...

Why it matters The 'mingled yarn' speech is one of the play's most quoted lines — a genuine, unironic statement of moral complexity that applies to every character in the play, but especially to Bertram. It arrives just before his entrance.
Enter a Messenger.
How now? Where’s your master?
MESSENGER MESSENGER

He met the duke in the street, sir; of whom he hath taken a solemn

leave: his lordship will next morning for France. The duke hath offered

him letters of commendations to the king.

He met the duke in the street, sir; of whom he has taken a solemn leave: his lordship will next morning for France. The duke has offered him letters of commendations to the king.

he met the duke in the street, sir; of whom he has taken a solemn leave: h's lordship will next morning for france. the duke has offered him letters of commendations to the king.

He met the duke in the street, sir; of whom he has...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

They shall be no more than needful there, if they were more than they

can commend.

They shall be no more than needful there, if they were more than they can commend.

they shall be no more than needful there, if they were more than they can commend.

They shall be no more than needful there, if they were more...

Enter Bertram.
FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

They cannot be too sweet for the king’s tartness. Here’s his lordship

now. How now, my lord, is’t not after midnight?

They cannot be too sweet for the king’s tartness. Here’s his lordship now. How now, my lord, is’t not after midnight?

they cannot be too sweet for the king’s tartness. here’s h's lordship now. how now, my lord, is’t not after midnight?

They cannot be too sweet for the king’s tartness. Here’s his lordship...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

I have tonight despatch’d sixteen businesses, a month’s length apiece;

by an abstract of success: I have congied with the duke, done my adieu

with his nearest; buried a wife, mourn’d for her, writ to my lady

mother I am returning, entertained my convoy, and between these main

parcels of despatch effected many nicer needs: the last was the

greatest, but that I have not ended yet.

I have tonight despatch’d sixteen businesses, a month’s length apiece; by an abstract of success: I have congied with the duke, done my adieu with his nearest; buried a wife, mourn’d for her, writ to my lady mother I am returning, entertained my convoy, and between these main parcels of despatch effected many nicer needs: the last was the greatest, but that I have not ended yet.

i 've tonight despatch’d sixteen businesses, a month’s length apiece; by an abstract of success: i 've congied with the duke, done my adieu with h's nearest; buried a wife, mourn’d for her, writ to my lady mother i am returning, entertained my convoy, and between these main parcels of despatch effected many nicer needs: the last was the greatest, but that i 've not ended yet.

I have tonight despatch’d sixteen businesses, a month’s length apiece; by an...

"buried a wife, mourn’d for her" Bertram lists his wife's death as one item in a productivity summary — between 'said farewell to the Duke's inner circle' and 'wrote to my mother.' The callousness is Shakespeare's, and it's deliberate. He mourned her the way you would tick a box.
Why it matters Bertram's list of his evening's 'businesses' — in which Helena's death appears between administrative tasks — is one of the play's most devastating moments. It says more about his character than anything he could deliberately say.
🎭 Dramatic irony Bertram lists 'buried a wife, mourned for her' in a productivity summary as if ticking administrative tasks. The audience knows Helena is alive — and that Bertram's mourning lasted approximately the time it took to write a list.
SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

If the business be of any difficulty and this morning your departure

hence, it requires haste of your lordship.

If the business be of any difficulty and this morning your departure hence, it requires haste of your lordship.

if the business be of any difficulty and th's morning your departure hence, it requires haste of your lordship.

If the business be of any difficulty and this morning your departure...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it hereafter.

But shall we have this dialogue between the Fool and the Soldier? Come,

bring forth this counterfeit module has deceiv’d me like a

double-meaning prophesier.

I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the Fool and the Soldier? Come, bring forth this counterfeit module has deceiv’d me like a double-meaning prophesier.

i mean the business 's not ended, as fearing to hear of it hereafter. but shall we 've th's dialogue between the fool and the soldier? come, bring forth th's counterfeit module has deceiv’d me like a double-meaning prophesier.

I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Bring him forth.

Bring him forth.

bring him forth.

Bring him forth.

[_Exeunt Soldiers._]
Has sat i’ the stocks all night, poor gallant knave.
BERTRAM BERTRAM

No matter; his heels have deserv’d it, in usurping his spurs so long.

How does he carry himself?

No matter; his heels have deserv’d it, in usurping his spurs so long. How does he carry himself?

no matter; h's heels 've deserv’d it, in usurping h's spurs so long. how does he carry himself?

No matter; his heels have deserv’d it, in usurping his spurs so...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

I have told your lordship already; the stocks carry him. But to answer

you as you would be understood: he weeps like a wench that had shed her

milk; he hath confessed himself to Morgan, whom he supposes to be a

friar, from the time of his remembrance to this very instant disaster

of his setting i’ the stocks. And what think you he hath confessed?

I have told your lordship already; the stocks carry him. But to answer you as you would be understood: he weeps like a wench that had shed her milk; he has confessed himself to Morgan, whom he supposes to be a friar, from the time of his remembrance to this very instant disaster of his setting i’ the stocks. And what think you he has confessed?

i 've told your lordship already; the stocks carry him. but to answer you as you would be understood: he weeps like a wench that had shed her milk; he has confessed himself to morgan, whom he supposes to be a friar, from the time of h's remembrance to th's very instant disaster of h's setting i’ the stocks. and what think you he has confessed?

I have told your lordship already; the stocks carry him. But to...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

Nothing of me, has he?

Nothing of me, has he?

nothing of me, has he?

Nothing of me, has he?

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

His confession is taken, and it shall be read to his face; if your

lordship be in’t, as I believe you are, you must have the patience to

hear it.

His confession is taken, and it shall be read to his face; if your lordship be in’t, as I believe you are, you must have the patience to hear it.

h's confession 's taken, and it shall be read to h's face; if your lordship be in’t, as i believe you are, you must 've the patience to hear it.

His confession is taken, and it shall be read to his face;...

Enter Soldiers with Parolles.
BERTRAM BERTRAM

A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me; hush, hush!

A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me; hush, hush!

a plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me; hush, hush!

A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me; hush,...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Hoodman comes! _Portotartarossa._

Hoodman comes! _Portotartarossa._

hoodman comes! _portotartarossa._

Hoodman comes! _Portotartarossa._

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

He calls for the tortures. What will you say without ’em?

He calls for the tortures. What will you say without ’em?

he calls for the tortures. what will you say without ’em?

He calls for the tortures. What will you say without ’em?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

I will confess what I know without constraint. If ye pinch me like a

pasty I can say no more.

I will confess what I know without constraint. If ye pinch me like a pasty I can say no more.

i will confess what i know without constraint. if ye pinch me like a pasty i can say no more.

I will confess what I know without constraint. If ye pinch me...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

_Bosko chimurcho._

_Bosko chimurcho._

_bosko chimurcho._

_Bosko chimurcho._

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

_Boblibindo chicurmurco._

_Boblibindo chicurmurco._

_boblibindo chicurmurco._

_Boblibindo chicurmurco._

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

You are a merciful general. Our general bids you answer to what I shall

ask you out of a note.

You are a merciful general. Our general bids you answer to what I shall ask you out of a note.

you 're a merciful general. our general bids you answer to what i shall ask you out of a note.

You are a merciful general. Our general bids you answer to what...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

And truly, as I hope to live.

And truly, as I hope to live.

and truly, as i hope to live.

And truly, as I hope to live.

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

‘First demand of him how many horse the duke is strong.’ What say you

to that?

‘First demand of him how many horse the duke is strong.’ What say you to that?

‘first demand of him how many horse the duke 's strong.’ what say you to that?

‘First demand of him how many horse the duke is strong.’ What...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops are

all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon my reputation

and credit, and as I hope to live.

Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops are all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon my reputation and credit, and as I hope to live.

five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops 're all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon my reputation and credit, and as i hope to live.

Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops are...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Shall I set down your answer so?

Shall I set down your answer so?

shall i set down your answer so?

Shall I set down your answer so?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Do. I’ll take the sacrament on ’t, how and which way you will.

Do. I’ll take the sacrament on ’t, how and which way you will.

do. i’ll take the sacrament on ’t, how and which way you will.

Do. I’ll take the sacrament on ’t, how and which way you...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

All’s one to him. What a past-saving slave is this!

All’s one to him. What a past-saving slave is this!

all’s one to him. what a past-saving slave 's this!

All’s one to him. What a past-saving slave is this!

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

You are deceived, my lord; this is Monsieur Parolles, the gallant

militarist (that was his own phrase), that had the whole theoric of war

in the knot of his scarf, and the practice in the chape of his dagger.

You are deceived, my lord; this is Monsieur Parolles, the gallant militarist (that was his own phrase), that had the whole theoric of war in the knot of his scarf, and the practice in the chape of his dagger.

you 're deceived, my lord; th's 's monsieur parolles, the gallant militarist (that was h's own phrase), that had the whole theoric of war in the knot of h's scarf, and the practice in the chape of h's dagger.

You are deceived, my lord; this is Monsieur Parolles, the gallant militarist...

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean, nor believe

he can have everything in him by wearing his apparel neatly.

I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean, nor believe he can have everything in him by wearing his apparel neatly.

i will never trust a man again for keeping h's sword clean, nor believe he can 've everything in him by wearing h's apparel neatly.

I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean,...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that’s set down.

Well, that’s set down.

well, that’s set down.

Well, that’s set down.

PAROLLES PAROLLES

‘Five or six thousand horse’ I said—I will say true—or thereabouts, set

down,—for I’ll speak truth.

‘Five or six thousand horse’ I said—I will say true—or thereabouts, set down,—for I’ll speak truth.

‘five or six thousand horse’ i said—i will say true—or thereabouts, set down,—for i’ll speak truth.

‘Five or six thousand horse’ I said—I will say true—or thereabouts, set...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

He’s very near the truth in this.

He’s very near the truth in this.

he’s very near the truth in this.

He’s very near the truth in this.

BERTRAM BERTRAM

But I con him no thanks for’t in the nature he delivers it.

But I con him no thanks for’t in the nature he delivers it.

but i con him no thanks for’t in the nature he delivers it.

But I con him no thanks for’t in the nature he delivers...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Poor rogues, I pray you say.

Poor rogues, I pray you say.

poor rogues, i pray you say.

Poor rogues, I pray you say.

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that’s set down.

Well, that’s set down.

well, that’s set down.

Well, that’s set down.

PAROLLES PAROLLES

I humbly thank you, sir; a truth’s a truth, the rogues are marvellous

poor.

I humbly thank you, sir; a truth’s a truth, the rogues are marvellous poor.

i humbly thank you, sir; a truth’s a truth, the rogues 're marvellous poor.

I humbly thank you, sir; a truth’s a truth, the rogues are...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

‘Demand of him of what strength they are a-foot.’ What say you to that?

‘Demand of him of what strength they are a-foot.’ What say you to that?

‘demand of him of what strength they 're a-foot.’ what say you to that?

‘Demand of him of what strength they are a-foot.’ What say you...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour, I will tell

true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty, Sebastian, so many;

Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; Guiltian, Cosmo, Lodowick, and

Gratii, two hundred fifty each; mine own company, Chitopher, Vaumond,

Bentii, two hundred fifty each: so that the muster-file, rotten and

sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand poll; half of the

which dare not shake the snow from off their cassocks lest they shake

themselves to pieces.

By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour, I will tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty, Sebastian, so many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; Guiltian, Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred fifty each; mine own company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred fifty each: so that the muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand poll; half of the which dare not shake the snow from off their cassocks lest they shake themselves to pieces.

by my troth, sir, if i were to live th's present hour, i will tell true. let me see: spurio, a hundred and fifty, sebastian, so many; corambus, so many; jaques, so many; guiltian, cosmo, lodowick, and gratii, two hundred fifty each; mine own company, chitopher, vaumond, bentii, two hundred fifty each: so that the muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand poll; half of the which d're not shake the snow from off their cassocks lest they shake themselves to pieces.

By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour,...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

What shall be done to him?

What shall be done to him?

what shall be done to him?

What shall be done to him?

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my condition, and what

credit I have with the duke.

Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my condition, and what credit I have with the duke.

nothing, but let him 've thanks. demand of him my condition, and what credit i 've with the duke.

Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my condition, and...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that’s set down. ‘You shall demand of him whether one Captain

Dumaine be i’ the camp, a Frenchman; what his reputation is with the

duke, what his valour, honesty and expertness in wars; or whether he

thinks it were not possible with well-weighing sums of gold to corrupt

him to a revolt.’ What say you to this? What do you know of it?

Well, that’s set down. ‘You shall demand of him whether one Captain Dumaine be i’ the camp, a Frenchman; what his reputation is with the duke, what his valour, honesty and expertness in wars; or whether he thinks it were not possible with well-weighing sums of gold to corrupt him to a revolt.’ What say you to this? What do you know of it?

well, that’s set down. ‘you shall demand of him whether one captain dumaine be i’ the camp, a frenchman; what h's reputation 's with the duke, what h's valour, honesty and expertness in wars; or whether he thinks it were not possible with well-weighing sums of gold to corrupt him to a revolt.’ what say you to this? what do you know of it?

Well, that’s set down. ‘You shall demand of him whether one Captain...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

I beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the inter’gatories.

Demand them singly.

I beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the inter’gatories. Demand them singly.

i beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the inter’gatories. demand them singly.

I beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the inter’gatories....

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Do you know this Captain Dumaine?

Do you know this Captain Dumaine?

do you know th's captain dumaine?

Do you know this Captain Dumaine?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

I know him: he was a botcher’s ’prentice in Paris, from whence he was

whipped for getting the shrieve’s fool with child, a dumb innocent that

could not say him nay.

I know him: he was a botcher’s ’prentice in Paris, from whence he was whipped for getting the shrieve’s fool with child, a dumb innocent that could not say him no.

i know him: he was a botcher’s ’prentice in paris, from whence he was whipped for getting the shrieve’s fool with child, a dumb innocent that could not say him no.

I know him: he was a botcher’s ’prentice in Paris, from whence...

[_First Lord lifts up his hand in anger._]
BERTRAM BERTRAM

Nay, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his brains are

forfeit to the next tile that falls.

no, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his brains are forfeit to the next tile that falls.

no, by your leave, hold your hands; though i know h's brains 're forfeit to the next tile that falls.

no, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his brains...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence’s camp?

Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence’s camp?

well, 's th's captain in the duke of florence’s camp?

Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence’s camp?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Nay, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship anon.

no, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship soon.

no, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship soon.

no, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

What is his reputation with the duke?

What is his reputation with the duke?

what 's h's reputation with the duke?

What is his reputation with the duke?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

The duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine, and writ to

me this other day to turn him out o’ the band. I think I have his

letter in my pocket.

The duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine, and writ to me this other day to turn him out o’ the band. I think I have his letter in my pocket.

the duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine, and writ to me th's other day to turn him out o’ the band. i think i 've h's letter in my pocket.

The duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Marry, we’ll search.

Marry, we’ll search.

marry, we’ll search.

Marry, we’ll search.

PAROLLES PAROLLES

In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there or it is upon a

file, with the duke’s other letters, in my tent.

In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there or it is upon a file, with the duke’s other letters, in my tent.

in good sadness, i do not know; either it 's there or it 's upon a file, with the duke’s other letters, in my tent.

In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there or...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Here ’tis; here’s a paper; shall I read it to you?

Here ’is; here’s a paper; shall I read it to you?

here ’is; here’s a paper; shall i read it to you?

Here ’is; here’s a paper; shall I read it to you?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

I do not know if it be it or no.

I do not know if it be it or no.

i do not know if it be it or no.

I do not know if it be it or no.

BERTRAM BERTRAM

Our interpreter does it well.

Our interpreter does it well.

our interpreter does it well.

Our interpreter does it well.

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Excellently.

Excellently.

excellently.

Excellently.

[_Reads._] _Dian, the Count’s a fool, and full of gold._
PAROLLES PAROLLES

That is not the duke’s letter, sir; that is an advertisement to a

proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the allurement of

one Count Rossillon, a foolish idle boy, but for all that very ruttish.

I pray you, sir, put it up again.

That is not the duke’s letter, sir; that is an advertisement to a proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the allurement of one Count Rossillon, a foolish idle boy, but for all that very ruttish. I pray you, sir, put it up again.

that 's not the duke’s letter, sir; that 's an advertisement to a proper maid in florence, one diana, to take heed of the allurement of one count rossillon, a foolish idle boy, but for all that very ruttish. i pray you, sir, put it up again.

That is not the duke’s letter, sir; that is an advertisement to...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

Nay, I’ll read it first by your favour.

no, I’ll read it first by your favour.

no, i’ll read it first by your favour.

no, I’ll read it first by your favour.

PAROLLES PAROLLES

My meaning in’t, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of the maid;

for I knew the young count to be a dangerous and lascivious boy, who is

a whale to virginity, and devours up all the fry it finds.

My meaning in’t, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of the maid; for I knew the young count to be a dangerous and lascivious boy, who is a whale to virginity, and devours up all the fry it finds.

my meaning in’t, i protest, was very honest in the behalf of the maid; for i knew the young count to be a dangerous and lascivious boy, who 's a whale to virginity, and devours up all the fry it finds.

My meaning in’t, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of...

"a whale to virginity, and devours up all the fry it finds" 'Fry' means small fish — young, small prey. Parolles casts Bertram as a whale consuming minnows. That he's protecting Diana by saying this makes it both self-serving and accidentally accurate.
BERTRAM BERTRAM

Damnable both sides rogue!

Damnable both sides rogue!

damnable both sides rogue!

Damnable both sides rogue!

[_Reads._]
FIRST SOLDIER ≋ verse FIRST SOLDIER

_When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it;

After he scores, he never pays the score.

Half won is match well made; match, and well make it;

He ne’er pays after-debts, take it before.

And say a soldier, ‘Dian,’ told thee this:

Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss;

For count of this, the count’s a fool, I know it,

Who pays before, but not when he does owe it.

Thine, as he vow’d to thee in thine ear,_

_When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it; After he scores, he never pays the score. Half won is match well made; match, and well make it; He ne’er pays after-debts, take it before. And say a soldier, ‘Dian,’ told you this: Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss; For count of this, the count’s a fool, I know it, Who pays before, but not when he does owe it. yours, as he vow’d to you in yours ear,_

_when he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it; after he scores, he never pays the score. half won 's match well made; match, and well make it; he ne’er pays after-debts, take it before. and say a soldier, ‘dian,’ told you this: men 're to mell with, boys 're not to kiss; for count of this, the count’s a fool, i know it, who pays before, but not when he does owe it. yours, as he vow’d to you in yours ear,_

_When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it; After...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

He shall be whipped through the army with this rhyme in’s forehead.

He shall be whipped through the army with this rhyme in’s forehead.

he shall be whipped through the army with th's rhyme in’s forehead.

He shall be whipped through the army with this rhyme in’s forehead.

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist, and the

armipotent soldier.

This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist, and the armipotent soldier.

th's 's your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist, and the armipotent soldier.

This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist, and the armipotent...

BERTRAM BERTRAM

I could endure anything before but a cat, and now he’s a cat to me.

I could endure anything before but a cat, and now he’s a cat to me.

i could endure anything before but a cat, and now he’s a cat to me.

I could endure anything before but a cat, and now he’s a...

"he's a cat to me" Bertram's disgust at 'cats' recurs through the scene — cats were associated with sneakiness and duplicity. For Bertram to keep comparing Parolles to a cat is both funny and revealing: his deepest grievance is not the betrayal itself but the feeling of being made a fool.
FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

I perceive, sir, by our general’s looks we shall be fain to hang you.

I perceive, sir, by our general’s looks we shall be fain to hang you.

i perceive, sir, by our general’s looks we shall be fain to hang you.

I perceive, sir, by our general’s looks we shall be fain to...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

My life, sir, in any case. Not that I am afraid to die, but that, my

offences being many, I would repent out the remainder of nature. Let me

live, sir, in a dungeon, i’ the stocks, or anywhere, so I may live.

My life, sir, in any case. Not that I am afraid to die, but that, my offences being many, I would repent out the remainder of nature. Let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i’ the stocks, or anywhere, so I may live.

my life, sir, in any case. not that i am afraid to die, but that, my offences being many, i would repent out the remainder of nature. let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i’ the stocks, or anywhere, so i may live.

My life, sir, in any case. Not that I am afraid to...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

We’ll see what may be done, so you confess freely. Therefore, once more

to this Captain Dumaine: you have answer’d to his reputation with the

duke, and to his valour. What is his honesty?

We’ll see what may be done, so you confess freely. Therefore, once more to this Captain Dumaine: you have answer’d to his reputation with the duke, and to his valour. What is his honesty?

we’ll see what may be done, so you confess freely. therefore, once more to th's captain dumaine: you 've answer’d to h's reputation with the duke, and to h's valour. what 's h's honesty?

We’ll see what may be done, so you confess freely. Therefore, once...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes and ravishments

he parallels Nessus. He professes not keeping of oaths; in breaking

them he is stronger than Hercules. He will lie, sir, with such

volubility that you would think truth were a fool: drunkenness is his

best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk, and in his sleep he does

little harm, save to his bedclothes about him; but they know his

conditions and lay him in straw. I have but little more to say, sir, of

his honesty; he has everything that an honest man should not have; what

an honest man should have, he has nothing.

He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes and ravishments he parallels Nessus. He professes not keeping of oaths; in breaking them he is stronger than Hercules. He will lie, sir, with such volubility that you would think truth were a fool: drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk, and in his sleep he does little harm, save to his bedclothes about him; but they know his conditions and lay him in straw. I have but little more to say, sir, of his honesty; he has everything that an honest man should not have; what an honest man should have, he has nothing.

he will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes and ravishments he parallels nessus. he professes not keeping of oaths; in breaking them he 's stronger than hercules. he will lie, sir, with such volubility that you would think truth were a fool: drunkenness 's h's best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk, and in h's sleep he does little harm, save to h's bedclothes about him; but they know h's conditions and lay him in straw. i 've but little more to say, sir, of h's honesty; he has everything that an honest man should not have; what an honest man should have, he has nothing.

He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

I begin to love him for this.

I begin to love him for this.

i begin to love him for this.

I begin to love him for this.

BERTRAM BERTRAM

For this description of thine honesty? A pox upon him for me, he’s more

and more a cat.

For this description of yours honesty? A pox upon him for me, he’s more and more a cat.

for th's description of yours honesty? a pox upon him for me, he’s more and more a cat.

For this description of yours honesty? A pox upon him for me,...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

What say you to his expertness in war?

What say you to his expertness in war?

what say you to h's expertness in war?

What say you to his expertness in war?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Faith, sir, has led the drum before the English tragedians,—to belie

him I will not,—and more of his soldiership I know not, except in that

country he had the honour to be the officer at a place there called

Mile-end, to instruct for the doubling of files. I would do the man

what honour I can, but of this I am not certain.

Faith, sir, has led the drum before the English tragedians,—to belie him I will not,—and more of his soldiership I know not, except in that country he had the honour to be the officer at a place there called Mile-end, to instruct for the doubling of files. I would do the man what honour I can, but of this I am not certain.

faith, sir, has led the drum before the english tragedians,—to belie him i will not,—and more of h's soldiership i know not, except in that country he had the honour to be the officer at a place there called mile-end, to instruct for the doubling of files. i would do the man what honour i can, but of th's i am not certain.

Faith, sir, has led the drum before the English tragedians,—to belie him...

"led the drum before the English tragedians" Acting troupes employed a drummer to walk before the company advertising performances. This is Parolles' honest military CV: not a soldier at all, but a theatrical drummer. It perfectly encapsulates the play's theme of performance versus reality.
FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

He hath out-villain’d villainy so far that the rarity redeems him.

He has out-villain’d villainy so far that the rarity redeems him.

he has out-villain’d villainy so far that the rarity redeems him.

He has out-villain’d villainy so far that the rarity redeems him.

BERTRAM BERTRAM

A pox on him! He’s a cat still.

A pox on him! He’s a cat still.

a pox on him! he’s a cat still.

A pox on him! He’s a cat still.

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask you if gold

will corrupt him to revolt.

His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask you if gold will corrupt him to revolt.

h's qualities being at th's poor price, i need not to ask you if gold will corrupt him to revolt.

His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Sir, for a quart d’ecu he will sell the fee-simple of his salvation,

the inheritance of it, and cut the entail from all remainders, and a

perpetual succession for it perpetually.

Sir, for a quart d’ecu he will sell the fee-simple of his salvation, the inheritance of it, and cut the entail from all remainders, and a perpetual succession for it perpetually.

sir, for a quart d’ecu he will sell the fee-simple of h's salvation, the inheritance of it, and cut the entail from all remainders, and a perpetual succession for it perpetually.

Sir, for a quart d’ecu he will sell the fee-simple of his...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

What’s his brother, the other Captain Dumaine?

What’s his brother, the other Captain Dumaine?

what’s h's brother, the other captain dumaine?

What’s his brother, the other Captain Dumaine?

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Why does he ask him of me?

Why does he ask him of me?

why does he ask him of me?

Why does he ask him of me?

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

What’s he?

What’s he?

what’s he?

What’s he?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

E’en a crow o’ the same nest; not altogether so great as the first in

goodness, but greater a great deal in evil. He excels his brother for a

coward, yet his brother is reputed one of the best that is. In a

retreat he outruns any lackey; marry, in coming on he has the cramp.

E’en a crow o’ the same nest; not altogether so great as the first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil. He excels his brother for a coward, yet his brother is reputed one of the best that is. In a retreat he outruns any lackey; marry, in coming on he has the cramp.

e’en a crow o’ the same nest; not altogether so great as the first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil. he excels h's brother for a coward, yet h's brother 's reputed one of the best that is. in a retreat he outruns any lackey; marry, in coming on he has the cramp.

E’en a crow o’ the same nest; not altogether so great as...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

If your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the Florentine?

If your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the Florentine?

if your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the florentine?

If your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the Florentine?

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rossillon.

Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rossillon.

ay, and the captain of h's horse, count rossillon.

Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rossillon.

🎭 Dramatic irony Parolles offers to betray 'Count Rossillon' — Bertram — to his captors. He doesn't know Bertram is standing right there, already hearing everything.
FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

I’ll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.

I’ll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.

i’ll whisper with the general, and know h's pleasure.

I’ll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.

[_Aside._] I’ll no more drumming; a plague of all drums! Only to seem
PAROLLES PAROLLES

to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious

young boy the count, have I run into this danger: yet who would have

suspected an ambush where I was taken?

to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious young boy the count, have I run into this danger: yet who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken?

to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious young boy the count, 've i run into th's danger: yet who would 've suspected an ambush where i was taken?

to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious young...

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

There is no remedy, sir, but you must die. The general says you that

have so traitorously discovered the secrets of your army, and made such

pestiferous reports of men very nobly held, can serve the world for no

honest use; therefore you must die. Come, headsman, off with his head.

There is no remedy, sir, but you must die. The general says you that have so traitorously discovered the secrets of your army, and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly held, can serve the world for no honest use; therefore you must die. Come, headsman, off with his head.

there 's no remedy, sir, but you must die. the general says you that 've so traitorously discovered the secrets of your army, and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly held, can serve the world for no honest use; therefore you must die. come, headsman, off with h's head.

There is no remedy, sir, but you must die. The general says...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

O Lord! sir, let me live, or let me see my death.

O Lord! sir, let me live, or let me see my death.

o lord! sir, let me live, or let me see my death.

O Lord! sir, let me live, or let me see my death.

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.

That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.

that shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.

That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.

[_Unmuffling him._]
So, look about you; know you any here?
BERTRAM BERTRAM

Good morrow, noble captain.

Good morrow, noble captain.

good morrow, noble captain.

Good morrow, noble captain.

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

God bless you, Captain Parolles.

God bless you, Captain Parolles.

god bless you, captain parolles.

God bless you, Captain Parolles.

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

God save you, noble captain.

God save you, noble captain.

god save you, noble captain.

God save you, noble captain.

SECOND LORD SECOND LORD

Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafew? I am for France.

Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafew? I am for France.

captain, what greeting will you to my lord lafew? i am for france.

Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafew? I am for...

FIRST LORD FIRST LORD

Good Captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ to Diana

in behalf of the Count Rossillon? And I were not a very coward I’d

compel it of you; but fare you well.

Good Captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ to Diana in behalf of the Count Rossillon? And I were not a very coward I’d compel it of you; but fare you well.

good captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ to diana in behalf of the count rossillon? and i were not a very coward i’d compel it of you; but f're you well.

Good Captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you...

[_Exeunt Bertram, Lords &c._]
FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

You are undone, captain: all but your scarf; that has a knot on’t yet.

You are undone, captain: all but your scarf; that has a knot on’t yet.

you 're undone, captain: all but your scarf; that has a knot on’t yet.

You are undone, captain: all but your scarf; that has a knot...

PAROLLES PAROLLES

Who cannot be crushed with a plot?

Who cannot be crushed with a plot?

who cannot be crushed with a plot?

Who cannot be crushed with a plot?

FIRST SOLDIER FIRST SOLDIER

If you could find out a country where but women were that had received

so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation. Fare ye well, sir. I

am for France too; we shall speak of you there.

If you could find out a country where but women were that had received so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation. Fare ye well, sir. I am for France too; we shall speak of you there.

if you could find out a country where but women were that had received so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation. f're ye well, sir. i am for france too; we shall speak of you there.

If you could find out a country where but women were that...

[_Exeunt._]
PAROLLES ≋ verse PAROLLES

Yet am I thankful. If my heart were great

’Twould burst at this. Captain I’ll be no more,

But I will eat, and drink, and sleep as soft

As captain shall. Simply the thing I am

Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart,

Let him fear this; for it will come to pass

That every braggart shall be found an ass.

Rust, sword; cool, blushes; and, Parolles live

Safest in shame; being fool’d, by foolery thrive.

There’s place and means for every man alive.

I’ll after them.

Yet am I thankful. If my heart were great ’Twould burst at this. Captain I’ll be no more, But I will eat, and drink, and sleep as soft As captain shall. Simply the thing I am Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart, Let him fear this; for it will come to pass That every braggart shall be found an ass. Rust, sword; cool, blushes; and, Parolles live Safest in shame; being fool’d, by foolery thrive. There’s place and means for every man alive. I’ll after them.

yet am i thankful. if my heart were great ’twould burst at this. captain i’ll be no more, but i will eat, and drink, and sleep as soft as captain shall. simply the thing i am shall make me live. who knows himself a braggart, let him fear this; for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass. rust, sword; cool, blushes; and, parolles live safest in shame; being fool’d, by foolery thrive. there’s place and means for every man alive. i’ll after them.

Yet am I thankful. If my heart were great ’Twould burst at...

Why it matters This is the most honest and arguably the most moving speech in the play. Parolles invents a new identity from the wreckage: not a captain, not a soldier, not a hero — just himself, surviving. 'Simply the thing I am / Shall make me live' is as close to wisdom as this play gets.
[_Exit._]

The Reckoning

The great comic climax of the play arrives here, and it's funnier and darker than you expect. Parolles' confessions are hilarious — his portrait of the First Lord is magnificent slander — but the real payload is his soliloquy at the end, after everyone has left. Stripped of his audience, he invents a new philosophy on the spot: 'Simply the thing I am / Shall make me live.' A braggart soldier finds self-knowledge through humiliation and decides to live honestly. Meanwhile, Bertram has just cold-bloodedly itemized his night — 'buried a wife, mourned for her' in a list of admin — and received word of Helena's death without any visible grief. The comedy of Parolles throws the tragedy of Bertram into sharp relief.

If this happened today…

A startup's 'Chief Evangelist' — known for his tailored suits and keynote speeches about disruption — is captured in the parking garage by colleagues pretending to be rival consultants speaking utter corporate nonsense. Blindfolded. Within minutes he's dictating voice memos naming every team member's weaknesses, forwarding private Slack messages, and describing the CEO as 'a whale to market share who devours up all the runway it finds.' When they unmask him, his colleagues are standing there with coffee. He's silent for a moment. Then: 'Who cannot be crushed with a Zoom?' He gets in his car and drives to Lafew's house to ask for a job.

Continue to 4.4 →